Step 4: Don’t expect a sexual relationship in the beginning
Hook up culture is definitely not a thing in Japan, and it’s one of the last places in the world you want to go if all you’re doing is looking for a sexual encounter
I’ve mentioned this in several other recent posts, but it’s worth repeating again: Japanese culture doesn’t appreciate sarcasm and dry humor the way we westerners do. I remember one time we back in 2005 when I was chatting online with a woman named Nae from Osaka.
We were both in our early 30s back then, and she was extremely timid and shy. She was also extremely kind and nice, and very fun to talk to. I certainly wasn’t trying to offend her when I made a joke about how “old” she was.
The chat ended abruptly, and it wasn’t until a couple days later when I finally reached her again via email that she told me she was extremely offended by my comment. Long story short: Learning how to deal with extremely sensitive women is one of the most important steps when it comes to learning how to date a Japanese girl.
The easiest way to avoid the sensitive issues is to cut the sarcasm entirely. At least until you can really get to know her and understand what she does and does not think is funny.
I shake my head in disgust every time I hear a western guy say that he is trying to meet Japanese girls because he heard that they were “really easy.” I know the truth (which is that they aren’t) and it fills me with joy to know that he’s setting himself up for a bucket load of stress and rejection for making ignorant assumptions.
That being said, Japanese culture isn’t as traditional as Malaysian culture for example. Malaysian girls will (under nearly no circumstance) have pre-marital intercourse with a man. This is due to strict religious and cultural beliefs. Japanese culture, on the other hand, isn’t a strict and premarital sex isn’t all that uncommon. All I’m saying is that it’s not going to be as easy compared to most western countries.
Step 5: Learn to be modest
If you’ve been paying attention so far, my hope is that you’re starting to understand that being modest and polite his how you’re going to succeed dating Japanese girls. To break this down as simply as possible, here is a list of things you need to do if you want any success dating women from Japan:
- Hold the door for her when walking into a house or a building
- Encourage her and tell her that she’s beautiful (this is huge since this is something that many Japanese men don’t do)
- Make an effort to learn her language. You don’t have to become completely fluent in Japanese, but making an effort (no matter how small) will show her that you care navЕЎtГvit naЕЎi strГЎnku about her enough to try.
- You must be willing to entertain the idea of living with her in Japan. This is something I talked quite a bit about in my article about what it’s like to marry a Japanese woman, and I highly recommend you read that (because it’s very important).
- Being able to show modesty is very important to a Japanese woman. Nobody likes a flamboyant showoff. Especially girls from Japan.
The last point is arguably the most important one from that entire list. Learning how to date Japanese woman requires modesty over all else. After all, modesty is the sign of a true gentleman, and that is what most Japanese women are craving.
